Don't Tread on Me, Nike

Anyone who knows me will tell you that I love sneakers, and I certainly don't have anything against Nike in general.  I'm the first to admit that the Oregon-based company has added a lot of good to amateur and professional sports, from innovative product technology to creative design elements.  That being said, I think Nike often wreaks havoc on team uniforms - take a look at what they've done to the University of Oregon's football uniforms over the last half decade and you'll see what I mean.  Granted, Nike isn't the only offender in this area - more recently, Maryland-based Under Armour has arguably made University of Maryland's football duds more offensive than Oregon's.

Nike and Under Armour have ruined Oregon and Maryland's football uniforms, respectively.

While I think a number of the Nike-designed college uniforms are hideous, they don't really bother me.  Schools like Oregon are just trying to use their unique look to put themselves on the national map, and to an extent it has worked - the Ducks are known as much for their crazy uniform combinations as they are for winning two straight Pac-12 titles.  For many teams, one-of-a-kind uniforms can be a major differentiating factor, and anyone who has seen Oregon or Maryland play football recently will agree that these two schools are, for better or worse, more memorable than your average state school football squad.

Where I get frustrated with Nike, however, is when they jazz up U.S. National Team uniforms for both soccer and basketball.  Today, Nike unveiled the new Team USA basketball uniforms and they are predictably ghastly (see below).  As a Yahoo! Sports blogger put it, "Nobody says United STATES of America. And when fans chant 'USA,' they don't hit the high note on the middle letter. You wouldn't know that based on Nike's 2012 Team USA basketball jerseys."  The new duds are just another example of Nike putting flair and novelty over class and sensibility, and while that choice might make sense for Oregon or Maryland, it doesn't work for the men (and women) representing our country on the field / court. 

Nothing says "America" like USA in the shape of a chevron.

In addition to being functional, uniforms are meant to represent the team wearing them.  The United States of America is the greatest and most recognized country in the world - a simple "USA" tells people more about our nation than an entire Wikipedia entry on other countries.  Between those three letters and our classic red, white and blue color scheme, people know what the USA and its national teams strive for - maximum effort and excellence.  Our national teams don't need Nike to add a bunch of bells and whistles (or, in this case, chevrons and font sizes) to make them stand out - wearing the red, white and blue and a simple "USA" on the chest is more than enough.  While I'm (sort of) comfortable with Nike using Oregon as it's funky uniform testing ground, I wish they'd leave Team USA out of it.  Save the crazy designs for Slovenia, please.